...but there is something good in every day."
This is probably the hardest thing I've ever posted. Even though I'm not Day 1 Laura anymore, I still remember my emotions whilst taking these first photos. I still remember the fear of judgement I felt in my daily life, the shame around who I'd let myself become, the utter sadness that consumed me looking in the mirror at this version of me. That Laura was exhausted, miserable and lacking in any spice. I'd lost the vibrancy that I've always been known for, I had no energy and I was sick of not achieving the things I desired. In my eyes, I was failing at all aspects of my life.
I'm writing this from bed 9B, Ward 81 in Auckland City Hospital. It is 1940 on Friday evening and I'm nil by mouth as I'm waiting for surgery on an infected whitetail bite under my arm. This ain't my first rodeo either, I was on the receiving end of a whitetail in June last year,… Continue reading Manifestation Is Everything.
- Have I done enough? - Have I trained enough? - Could I have eaten better? - Should I have trained twice a day? - I'm not where I wanna be.
The Breakdown happens every few months and they can last anywhere from a day to ten days. I've never found one to be triggered by anything but they seem to impact all areas of your life.
The last time I embarked on a huge weight loss journey, my birthday was the tipping point of losing my motivation and slowly hitting the brakes on the process. So I was nervous coming up to this one, on a similar journey, that I would repeat my history.
Let's do this!